It’s been a hot minute, but I’m back to blog.
Listen. I know nothing says middle-aged white dude like taking up running in your 40s. In 2020, COVID put a pause on my regular CrossFit classes, and I discovered that exercise is the best way for me to handle my anxiety – because with that regular class gone, it compounded quickly.
Now, I can’t compare my particular flavor of anxiety to anyone else’s. It’s complicated, and just know that if you suffer from panic attacks, discomfort with social situations, or simply freeze from time to time when life feels overwhelming, you have my sympathy. Anxiety can be something that drives you, but it can also be something that paralyzes you, and either way, managing it is the only way to be who you want to be. I want to be somebody that shows up for the people in my life.
Exercise helps me do that. And I discovered that for me, running actually does this better than CrossFit ever did. Nothing against CrossFit! The reason running works better for me is the sheer volume of time. I was one of those CrossFitters that loved the 45-60 minute workout – but those tend to be less frequently programmed, because they just crush you into pulp.
I started with a 5k route near my house. It’s still the route I use when I want to sneak in a run, and I’ve only got about 45 minutes, actually. It’s all bike path / sidewalk, so I’m not in traffic.
In the summer of 2020, I ran my first formal race. Formal in the sense that I got a bib that I pinned to my shirt – not formal in the sense that I was actually competing for anything. It was actually a marathon relay – the One in Five relay marathon at the Millennium Meadows park. I ran a five mile segment, which I believe was the longest single distance I’d yet run all in one go.
Shortly thereafter, I did the 10K Run thru the Rapids. 6.2 miles, and again, the longest distance I’d yet run.
I’m not a fast runner. If I finish a 10K in under an hour, that means I’m feeling really good and was able to move well that day. Most of my 10K runs tend to be between 1:05 and 1:15.
10K has become the distance that I regularly train with. When it’s warm outside, I run that distance at least 3 times a week. This time of year, I’m entirely indoor on the treadmill, so I only run a 10K distance on Saturdays. The rest of the week I stick to 3-4 miles – treadmill running is just too boring to do really long runs, so I split the workout between running and other movement just to keep my mind working.
Over the past few years, I’ve added more and more events to each running season. In 2022, I ran at least a 10K race each month from May through October, culminating in the Run thru the Rapids. In 2024, I did my first Sprint Triathlon – 750m swim, 20K bike, 5K run.
In 2025, I took it to the next level, running the 25K River Bank Run in May, the Grand Explorer’s Trail 10K in June, the Mill Creek Days 5K + 10K (yep, both back-to-back) in July, the Millennium Meadows half marathon in August, the Reeds Lake Sprint Triathlon in September, and my first full length marathon, the Grand Rapids Marathon in October.
It’s a lot of time. Time racing, yes, but mostly time training. That training time is invaluable, though, because that much time alone with my thoughts is exactly what I need to burn out those anxiety fuses in my brain and come back ready to show up for the people in my life.
Good cardio work has lots of health benefits, and I do physically feel quite good, especially when I’m in the training mode. But mostly, running is a hobby that creates good, quiet thinking time away from screens. I feel like I’m growing by pushing myself through it.
I’m looking forward to the year ahead. I plan to once again do the same races as 2025, but I also plan to do the Grand Rapids Triathlon in June – this will be my first Olympic-length, which is 1500m swim, 40K bike, and 10K run. My goal is to finish under 3 hours, but I will be happy just moving and crossing the finish line.